Old Bay


You cannot escape from the appeal of Old Bay seasoning. There are places in this world that won't let you leave the regionalism behind--they insist on bringing it with you.

At the King Sooper's, they have oodles of this stuff and the old fart who demanded that they stock it stopped buying it long ago. A normal human being can make one of these plastic tubs last three or four years. On the Eastern Shore, you might get through a holiday weekend with one.

There's nothing in Colorado worth seasoning. Even the dirtbags know that, when the Man brings you a burrito, you wolf it down and go back to getting high.

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